hmm. hahas.. maybe.. who knows.. maybe one day.. i no longer writes blog. instead a diary.? hahas. who knows? everyone didn't know it's smokescreen. i looked too cheerful as to being hurt.
but.. i've got desirable-wanted-to-be-answered questions.. how to.. how to.. tell me.. drop this heart that seemed like 1000 pounds that carried 2miles le. and i forgot how to hate. tell me.. what should i do. tell me.. why the heart is badly injured?
zzzz.. this is my reply from buddies.
I'm loaded to the gunwales, matey! stellaBlimey!
Yi Er San Si Wu says:
Cultivate seamless architectures. functionally strategic greetings stella
Yi Er San Si Wu says:
muah muah stella you’re better off alone darling. he was a reverse evolution prince.
&
"give yourself a month to love him and miss him.. then let go everything when time is up."
"no worries! we'll be by lala's side. it's okay! you have me!"
"when love becomes a routine, it's no longer love. believe me"
"no way love will bloom this way. i swear, you'll separate."
all these.. comments ran through my brain times and times. so am i wrong now? wrong to love? love the wrong person? or? tell me.. tell me.. why..
i'm living still living. i know. i feel it. everyday.. i woke up.. i hope i will. deteriorating. tell me. i'm escaping. tell me.. i hurt myself. i need a doctor in fact. the fact that..i'm not getting any better.. consuming food is boring again. let it be. hurt all you can.. be it dehydration, malnutrition, lack of food. die.
let me be.
the lungs.. hurt together. burning away. fainting together. flat lying down. it's okay.. death doesn't matter. i'm not good girl anyway.
rest.. kill me.
end of hearts
how.. i wish.. i don't remember i love you
but i love you..
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